Blah Blah Flowers

Andy McCarthy links Iran's nuclear program that hasn't produced any nukes yet with the excitement over America's border: Can the United States afford to take any action against Iran if our southern border is not secure? Which, as fear-mongering goes, is pretty pathetic. So here's my attempt to try and put into one sentence all the things American Conservatives hate:

Look out! Pregnant cloned Iranian lesbian suicide-bombers could smuggle nukes into America through Mexico!

Did I miss anything out?

Cockpies. It's a bank holiday weekend and no suprise, the weather for tomorrow and Monday is forecasted to be 'shitty'. So, as today may be the only dry day I'm busy with stuff to do. Doing some lunch right now, then I intend to head down to Tate Britain to catch the Gothic Nightmares exhibition before it closes on Monday. I did go down for Alan Moore's talk but didn't look around then, then managed to forget.

This morning I gave my little patch of back garden it's first mow of the year. That'll probably start my hayfever off (my nose is itching already, so it's either on it's way or I've turned into Samantha from Bewitched and no-one has told me). Now there's a red-red-robin bob-bob-bobbing around on the lawn looking for worms. I don't really have the patience for gardening, plus I have a slight disagreement with my neighbours and parents over what is technically a weed and what is a flower. If it's pretty, it stays. Mind you, my neighbour insists that was is now a small tree is actually a weed, so what does he know?

I now have an Oyster Card which is useful. However, at the moment they don't have a function on the website to see the journey's you've made on it, which means I can't use it for work travel and have to buy tickets the old fashioned way. When I phoned up today to check about how much had been deducted I was told they were working on it but it was for some reason quite difficult to do. If banks and credit card companies can give you itemised bills, if BT can give you a list of all the numbers you've phoned and if the person I talked to was able to call up a list himself, what's causing the hold-up transferring it to a web-page?

The Charles Clarke story rumbles on. With all that's happening I suspect Tony Blair must be hoping to reach a point where all the bad news matches and cancels itself out, maybe if the story about John Prescott having sex with someone in his office gets a little worse (and heaven knows, just getting as far as 'Prescott having sex' is pretty severe) it'll cancel out Charles Clarke letting loads of people out he shouldn't have. But then, what's going on here? It's giving the press a story in which they get to attack three sets of people, the Government, criminals and foreigners. Now, it's not that the Home Office went around looking for a thousand hardened nonces and murderers to let out early. These were people that were released from prisoner after serving their time. Most of them for non-violent offences. They aren't allowed to work while having their immigration application be dealt with and if crime equals an automatic deportation what are they supposed to do?

Dave Gorman on The Daily Show? Thank God I wasn't eating at the time.

CEA ad, fighting back against the RIAA
Originally uploaded by OwenBlacker.

Another Doctor Who songvid. (WARNING: This video contains scenes from the awful TV movie from the mid-nineties and, erm, Coldplay.)

If you're a Muslim, what are you going to do when you go into space? How can you pray to Mecca if your day lasts 90 minutes? How can you pray to Mecca when you're zooming round the earth? Thank Allah someone is dealing with these issues.

Fucking hell. The English are a bunch of rascist fuckwits. A majority of people back the British National Party's policies, according to a new poll. The Guardian tries to reassure it's readers the YouGov survey found that many people disown the policies once they are associated with the BNP but look at the figures, the numbers don't go down by much: It found that 59% of people supported a halt to all further immigration to the UK... when they were not told of the far-right group's association with the policy. Among those who were told that it was a BNP commitment, support for the policy was only 48%.

Wow! Only 48%? What, like only almost half the people asked ? So not only are most people rascist fuckwits who conveniently forget that English history is the history of a mongrel nation, they also don't vote honestly? I fucking despair...

Opposition parties urge Charles Clarke to resign over release of prisoners. Much as I dislike the jug-eared rascist gitwizard I'm not sure that it's that bad yet. After all, when a prisoner is released that does mean they've done their time for their crime. However, should one of those paedophiles be found with their todger up a toddler's bottom-hole or a murderer found have done more murderin', Clarke should resign whether our Tony who art in Downing Street accepts it or not.

More evidence of Kissinger's famous saying in effect. Or alternatively, I can't believe the woman I wanted to marry slept with Prescott.

Lords Cricket Ground, Middlesex Versus Kent
Originally uploaded by Loz Flowers.

Did I mention the time I was embaressed by meeting up with an Australian friend who had been in London for all of three days and knew her way around London better than I, who had been living here for several years?

Today I discovered how easy it is to get from where I live to Lords Cricket Ground, the Home of English Cricket. And I've lived where I do for six years.

Anyway, my Dad and I made the journey today. The cricketing season started last week and the photo shows you probably the entire spectating public. When we arrived we initially sat on the ground floor of the stands and I was surprised by how small it seemed compared to the images we all see on telly, where the camera stretches it all out. However, I took this photo after lunch when we sat higher up and the pitch did seem wider from above.

Apart from MCC-tie wearers pottering around the place was very quiet, so much so that we had real difficulty finding anything to eat, there were no burger vans, most places in the ground seemed to be members only and/or shut and eventually we had to follow the directions from the guy on the gate to find a Italian cafe. I hope that that was just a side-effect of it being very early in the season and not that Lords CC considers itself so posh it doesn't slum it with fast food vans and suchlike. Anyway, I'm looking for the details of the 20-20 match s and the Floodlight Game with interest.

The Sky News Vote at the moment is on whether the BNP has a place in British politics. Yes is winning by about three to one. Go vote.

I've forgotten most of the things I was going to write about this weekend, but Criminal Minds is currently rocking my world, especially Mandy Patinkin and the geeky-QT Matthew Gray Gubler. Have him oiled and sent to my tent etc etc.

I managed to last out until about ten minutes into the third episode of the second series of Green Wing before I remembered exactly why I never made it to the end of the first series either of the times I tried to watch it. It's a romantic comedy (which I hate) crossed with a sketch show such as The Fast Show or Little Britain, only with the humour often removed. Why watch an hour long show for the fifteen good minutes of material?

Rain, rain...

Fuck off!

Didn't you hear me yesterday? It's Spring already!

Info NeoGnostic (which must win an award for a great blog name) links to a discussion on Freepint about the worth of CILIP to us librarians. Admittedly a number of them are complaining because they work in commercial libraries which they believe CILIP ignores but it doesn't do much for us public librarians. I spent around a hundred pounds getting Chartered, only to find that increasingly I'm seeing management jobs being advertised where Chartership doesn't seem to be a pre-requisite. Meanwhile CILIP are belt-tightening at their plush central London HQ because of a budget shortfall. If the subscription wasn't tax deductable I'm not sure I'd bother paying membership each year.

No matter how sunny it is, Spring doesn't really start until you can walk home from work without wearing your coat.

Welcome to Spring.

I'm wearing man-drag today. Shirt, smart trousers, tie. I haven't shaved since Monday so am starting to look rather like Guy Garvey's cleaner-living, less-attractive younger brother.

Reading the Daily Mail instead of working this morning I found an article about how Lord Charlie Falconer has banned the word 'homosexual' from official court language, along with terms such as 'asylum seekers', on the grounds that Stonewall told him it was offensive to uphill gardeners. I can't find it reported in any publication that I wouldn't use as toilet paper, but Stonewall's website does indeed list that some homos find it offensive. Not being a term I'd use for myself I suppose I'm a bit 'meh' about it, It originates from a medical definition when same-sex attraction/relationships were construed as mental illness which is true enough, but as it's a Latin translation of what a gay person does, not actively couched in 'urgh! Bumsex!' tones it feels a bit like oversensitivity.

Celebrity junkie Pete Doherty was released on bail again yesterday, after being arrested buying drugs a few hours after being let off a prison sentence after pleading guilty to seven charges of drug posession but persuading the judge he was 'showing signs' of trying to break the habit. I'd love to know what signs these were. "Look Judge, he's taking off his belt and... tying it round his arm. This is obviously a sign that... umm he's going to fasten it to the desk to stop him running off and eating some 'Charlies'. And look, he's getting out his syringe and spoon to remind him of the life he's trying to put behind him, and, yes, he's 'boiling up' the heron so no-one else will have their lives blighted by it's blighting blight. He's just the new Messiah really."

I don't know, what kind of online personality test is it if it doesn't have it's own cool icons at the end?

The Machiavelli personality test has a range of 0-100
Your Machiavelli score is: 70
You are a high Mach, you endorse Machiavelli's opinions.
Most people fall somewhere in the middle, but there's a significant minority at either extreme.

The Salon Machiavelli personality test.

'Our goal is to create a national museum at first online and then as a physical institution, reflecting the diverse experiences of [Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans] people across the country and through time.' I just wish they'd chosen a better name than the rather GAK!-inducing Proud Heritage.

Have you ever wondered what would happen if David Bowie were asked to evaluate your life? Of course you have! Let's see.

Policeman: "Drop your weapons, you are surrounded by armed bastards!"

I heart Life on Mars .

Blimey, that's a new experience. A good Dannii Minogue song...

Oh no Madonna's in a cage and showing her arse...

Sorry I've been crap about writing anything meaningful here for ageeeees, these days personal stuff mainly goes into my LJ, where I can screen who sees it. I've been out of sorts for a while now and it's really just my rampant ego that keeps me going. It's mainly characterised by restlessness combined paradoxically with low energy, and I know what this is because I used to feel it a lot more six or seven years ago. At work I want to be at home, at home I want to be out, when out I want to be in bed. The unwatched TV programs, DVDs and downloaded shows mount up, the pile of unread books slowly grows and all I know is, whatever I want to do at any given moment is whatever I'm not doing at any given moment.

The suggestion from some friends that this is all caused by the counselling I've been doing since late January seems unconvincing, we haven't really got to anything icky in my subconscious yet and I think an hour a week talking about FABULOUS MEEEE!! wouldn't have a negative effect on me.

An obvious thing to do would be to stop sitting around being lazy. Unfortunately that's something I do so well...

There's an interesting article about last weeks launch of the 'Euston Manifesto'.

Human Clock.

I was supposed to tidy my place up this afternoon for the descending of my parents and sister tomorrow. That didn't happen. Still, there's always this evening, or tomorrow morning, or if I just lead them in wearing blindfolds.

I've told my landlord about my leaking pipes under the sink in the kitchen. They've got a plumber coming to their place on Monday week, and they've said they'll get them to come and have a look. Mind you, last year they were going to replace my rotting back wall and wooden patio doors. When I phoned them about the pipes they mentioned they were hoping to get someone along in the next few weeks to have a look and give them a quote. So, that's only two years after I first brought it up.

I watched the Spielberg/Cruise version of War of the Worlds this afternoon. That's a joyless couple of hours that I'll never get back. It's got that annoying little brat from Taken too. The CGI-work is great, as usual for a Spielberg film but otherwise, it's just so dull.

How bizarre. I've just had a smart couple, dressed like Jehovas Witnesses, knock on my front door and ask if I knew anyone in the area that spoke Polish. Now, I live in a quiet cul-de-sac off a road that's only really busy during the rush hour during the week, about five to ten minutes walk from the nearest tube or bus-stop. How on earth did they end up knocking on my front door?

'Democratic Progressives' launch new manifesto for the Left. Basically, let's stop complaining about Bush and Blair and the Iraqi war and anyone who persists is an anti-Semitic, Anti-American, racist Baathist thug.

Thsi doesn't seem to be reported elsewhere but the pink 'un is saying that Blair and Jim Murphy are backing down on the Regulatory Reform Bill which would replace the current dictatorial system that masquerades as democracy with something more honestly tyrannical.

Graffiti at the Top of the Monument
Originally uploaded by Loz Flowers.

The Monument in Monument Street was finished in 1677 to commemorate the Great Fire of London eleven years previously and the rebuilding of the City.

It contains a 311 step staircase up to a viewing platform that, on a clear day, give wonderful views over the city. That's three hundred and eleven very steep steps, in a tight corkscrew, so that when people wish to pass, those on the outside must press against the wall, those on the inside are shuffling up tiny steps.

I was depressed by how out-of-breath I was when I reached the top. My knees being buggered by the climbing is fair enough, the muscles cramping for the rest of the day I can put up with. But to be tired out by all that climbing?

I'm going to be thirty in August. And I'm really out of shape.

Well, that's going to ruin all the U.S's fun... They can't invade Iran if they've got nuclear weapons now.

And just a brief 'well done!' to the powers that be that decided that Easter Weekend was precisely the right time to shut down part of the Northern Line for repairs. Quite right too, why, it's not like anyone would be more likely to travel on it during a holiday weekend as opposed to a regular weekend is it?

Study announces that there a lot of gay men in San Francisco. Next up, a study announces that the greatest concentration of British people in the United Kingdom, a large number of Jews in Israel...

I love NASA's Images site. Their 'image of the day' gallery sometimes have pictures that make the Earth look stranger than any alien planet you could conceive.

British fascists choose grandson of a Greek-Armenian asylum seeker to stand for Bradford council. Unsurprisingly some BNP members aren't happy. Hopefully if elected he'd do better than this shower.

Argh! I've started putting sticky-tape round the door and window-frames, though I've used it all up so I'm using blu-tack instead. When that runs out I'll just have to find some other substance that can harden to form an impermiable barrier. Panic stations! There's a chaffinch with a sniffle outside my kitchen window!

The unlikeable continue to demand an apology from the unelectable. We are verging somewhat into pot and kettle territory.

The Tom Baker swears thing has been updated with songs. Tom singing 'Common People' knocks William Shatner's effort in to a cocked hat, and 'What Time is Now' will have Morrisey in a cold sweat. [via B3ta]

Just finished watching The God Who Wasn't There, or the short version at least, which I downloaded them forgot about aaaaaaages ago. Fairly good, though it doesn't address issues like 'what are the good things you get from religion?' or 'have you noticed how most American Evangelicals and Fundamentalists have been reading a completely different text to the ones we read as kids, with love thy neighbour crossed out and kill the fags biroed in instead?'. Maybe this would be addressed on the DVD. The version mainly points out the problems verifying the historical accuracy of the Gospels, how what happened to Jesus happened to any number of other figures.

What interest me is how Christinaity shifts to fit into the country it ends up in, it essentially promises you can build Jerusalem in Italy, England or the U.S., until the latter decided it would be more fun to break it all instead. Islam seems to be less flexible and adaptable, you change rather than it. I wonder if that's why Islamic cultures became theocracies so much quicker than Christianity, where it's really the U.S. As you can probably tell, I'm just improvising wildly here so this is going nowhere...

Minister for Killing People We Don't Like, John Reid, called for the Geneva Convention to be changed so that everything the US and UK have done thus far would be legal.

Victims of Britain's Cold War Guantanamo.

Reminder
Originally uploaded by mikkee1973.

In combination with the 25th Anniversary, David Byrne and Brian Eno are allowing remixers at their seminal My Life in the Bush of Ghosts.

Metal detectors to catch people carrying knives will be used by British Transport Police countrywide. Fine, but this is obviously thinendofthewedgetopia. In a few years you'll have to show your ID Card to travel anywhere and have a full body and cavity search at the start and end of each journey. And probably the police will have the right to come in to whatever private dwelling you're visiting and give you another probing without any justification as well.

If you're not a comics and/or X-Men fan this won't interest you.

All things squidy.

The Sultan's Elephant. Looks interesting, if the weather holds out.

The State Library of Victoria is building an archive of photos of the Commonwealth Games.

More on the Dickens Walk, Outside the Devereaux
Originally uploaded by Loz Flowers.

As a birthday treat for my Dad's imminent anniversary I took him and Mum to Temple tube station for one of the walks by 'The Original London Walks' Company, in this case, Dickens London. We were met by Jean, in authentic Victorian dress, who took us through Temple, up past the Royal Courts of Justice, along Temple's Inn Fields and through to Holborn, talking about Dickens life and places that turned up in his fiction. A very nice way to spend a couple of hours, although we had a few problems with the numbers of steps, as Mum has to use a wheelchair for distances.

When that was done we walked along the Strand and down to Embankment to catch the train home. The last time I took Mum on the tube was a couple of years ago. Things don't appear to have improved any since then.

Over Three Hundred Proofs of God's Existence. [via Siobhan]