Sunday, May 21, 2006

"On the day of Rockoning, It’s who dares, wins, You will see the jokers soon’ll be the new kings!"

I'd never watched The Eurovision Song Contest prior to last night, when we all piled round a friends house, smoke, drank, eat pizza and laughed ourselves silly. I also have to say that for the first in a very long time I felt pride in my fellow countrypersons, Britain gave Finland douze points.

Lordi were by far the best thing of the night, followed by LT United for Lithuania. It was interesting how English has pretty much become the lingua franca of Eurovision, France were pretty much the only holdouts, insisting on singing and voting entirely in French. Israel sounded like they sung their first verse in their native tongue before surrendering to the inevitable. It was odd as very few countries made any attempt to make a 'traditional' sound, perhaps showing how much Western music has penetrated? Israel's entry was a pish-sounding R'n'B that looked and sounded American, as though the US is not only giving Israel guns and money but exporting unwanted black groups too. I expect a shrill invective from Melanie Phillips any day now on how their poor showing is all down to European Anti-Semitism. Mind you, we can talk. What was up with Britain's entry? He looked like a supply teacher that had been bribed to leave a School Disco clubnight, which would at least explain the women dressed as schoolgirls who danced around him. I object to someone older than me trying to be 'down with da yoof', rapping about it and having a name that sounds like a character from an late-seventies British war comic, "Next week: Daz Sampson gives the Japs a taste of his British spunk!"

And Sir Terrance of Wogan, his commentary was great. He sounded like he'd been at his hotel minibar before things got underway and was the right mixture of sarcastic, condescending and unimpressed. So see you next year.


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