Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Worst Lyric of the Month: "Beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor, Michael you're dancing like a beautiful dance whore." Exactly how does a 'beautiful dance whore' dance Franz Ferdinand? Apart from that it's interesting how you've made quite a good song when the anecdotage for this, if New Musical Excrement is to be believed is that you all know a man, called Michael, who dances 'a bit gay'. Oh dear. There are two type of first albums (three if you count the simply crap ones), the ones which are fully formed and brilliant (waves at Bowie, the Dandy Warhols, Dubstar, Elbow and Massive Attack, to name a few) and the ones that are okay but which hint that given a second chance, the band can massively improve (Blur, Chemical Brothers, Nirvana, Orbital, Placebo). FF by FF is of the latter category, the singles are the best tracks on it, otherwise I get a teensy bit irritated when they press the buttons 'arch', 'ironic' and 'bunch of fucking art students', the first minute or so of first track 'Jacqueline' and the oh so casual dropping in of the German in the odd track here and there, to like this album is occasionally despite the band, not because of them.

Best lyric of the month: "I tried to do it proper but kept comin' up a cropper, I need some pipe think I'll ram raid Happy Shopper, haven't got a car so I'll use a space hopper." Well, honestly, you could put the entire album in there, it's the Goldie Lookin Chain's Greatest Hits. With odes to suicide, smoking soap bars and, yes, a clever and tender examination of sex reassignment surgery in later life- "Your Mother's Got a Penis". Yeah some of it is laughing at Welsh accents but this joycore of KLF-style proportions, a bunch of clueless idiots rapping about spending their giros on weed, trying to have sexual relations with a ZX Spectrum before their mates turn up to take the piss. The first Goldie album is full on and they'll have to raise their game considerably to beat this. Greatest Hits indeed.

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