Blah Blah Flowers

I neither care about nor particularly understand football, especially when it comes to the intricacies of managing it, so when Mark Lawson starts pontificating in the Guardian about Beckham possibly leaving and trying to cast it as some reverse Oedipus/homophobia thing Fergie sees Beckham as a threat to his birthright, ego and sexuality I can't help but laugh. What about all that post-match 'all boys in the shower' stuff then? Perhaps we can persuade one of the young footballers to wear a t-shirt that says All Football is Homosexual and cut the legend 4- Nill into his arm?

Otherwise, the headline Father Ted: 'Fergie hasn't spoken to David in months' did make me laugh and wonder a) whether they were employing a psychic at Guardian HQ, and b) what an Irish priest would know about English football.